December 9, 2011

Inventions S1E02: Facebook Tourists

Like I said, I am going to invent new words and phrases all week!

Facebook Tourist: Definition

You’re on the beach on a beautiful sunny day. The air is cool and the sun is warm. Gentle waves are crashing against the cliffs on the horizon while the seagulls are playfully flying around in circles. Walking along the beach, the bright sun is just hot enough to cover you in an invisible blanket of warmth. The big beautiful ocean invites you to take a swim in the crystal waters with each wave. 

As you walk barefooted through the warm golden sand, the gentle waves kiss your feet harmonically while tiny shiny sea shells tickle you randomly. You instinctively spread your arms and take a deep breath and for the first time in years, feel one with nature. And then your friend says, “Mama, tu idhar ek photu nikaal re. Facebook pe ye chadayetho… likes pe likes udaayenge bolroon mein!

We are all Facebook Tourists at some level or the other. Nothing inherently wrong with that! But a real Facebook Tourist takes it up to an entirely different level. For a true Facebook Tourist, beauty, history or significance of the place are irrelevant for most part. Whether they are on a Himalayan peak staring into the curvature of the Earth’s horizon or on top of the Eiffel Tower sipping champagne at sunset, at a serene temple in South India or in the gas chamber at the holocaust museum, the only thought that goes in their head is “If I give Titanic pose here, will it look cool aa?” 

A special mention here goes to people who upload pictures of them while they are eating. Enough has been said about them all over the internet. I am just mentioning them here to tell them that they belong in this category! 

How to Spot a Facebook Tourist?

It is not really difficult to spot a Facebook Tourist. I am sure many of your friends are Facebook Tourists themselves. So I’ll leave you with a partial list.

  • They typically have 242 profile pictures with the same expression but different backgrounds 
  • They feel that their trip is wasted if the photos don’t come out well 
  • They prefer recording Diwali celebrations with a handycam instead of actually celebrating Diwali
  • The only reason they visit the Leaning Tower of Pisa is to pose on the grass nearby trying to make the monument look like an erection! 
Home Work: Look through your Facebook News Feed to identify more characteristics of Facebook Tourists. Share them with the world (preferably in the comments or on the Facebook page)

P.S: SMBC pretty much nailed this thing long long back!

P.P.S: You may want to check out Episode 1 of this series here Inventions S1E01


  1. Filled with the exact balance of wit and fun that differentiates everyday humor from a masterpiece! Good going!

  2. Hahahahaha... Witty! Story of every facebook wall.. . With the ticker, acting like a death ticker. How nosey can one get in life? Click this, click that, snap this or snap that. "Shoot me from this angle - I look slim" , "Ugh - let me hold my hips in this way for the pic, I am gonna rock my fb wall" ... lol.. I bet even you have tons of pics on ur fb. I have none. Thanks to certain privacy settings :P. Fb is irritating to the core. 

  3. there are no other tourists except for facebook tourists!

  4. You forgot wannabe pros, who upload 100s of pics just to get 'likes' and comments like 'mast', 'sahi', etc. 

  5. I don't know what this is...but it seems to have many likes and comments, let me share this on my wall and see :P

  6. The Titantic poses never looks cool.


don't be lazy